Oh ya, I remember why this was hard...

For the first few weeks of my son's life, I was walking around the house saying some pretty silly things. Things like, "I don't know WHYYYY I thought this newborn thing was hard the first time!" and, "Man, I must have been a real whiner that last time around, because this is CAKE!" Now, granted, I wasn't saying that life with TWO beautiful little darling devils running around was easy, but that taking care of a newborn in comparison with taking care of a toddler who is intent on making you EARN a good night's rest is easier than I had remembered it being.

Silly me.

Silly, silly, stupid me.

I remember now. I remember why I cried so much the first night we had Alex home. I remember why this little person, this little person who couldn't move or talk so really what harm could they do, I remember why it's tough having an infant in the household.

SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP.

I miss the days of having a toddler and only a toddler who slept so nicely for twelve hours a night. I miss COLLEGE, where I could sleep so nicely for twelve hours in a row.

Granted, I would not go back. I would not change a thing (my husband, you see, he gave me a ring, and along with that ring, he surprised me twice more- so here is my lesson for all you crazy cats, don't sleep with a man, unless you want brats! ... sorry).

It could very well be easier the first time, because then at least you can sleep when the baby sleeps, even if it's in the middle of the day. Sleep is sleep, no matter how light it is outside. But with Alex, I can't do that. I don't sleep at night because of Eli, and I don't sleep during the day because of Alex. And it doesn't help that Eli is cluster-feeding right now, which for those of you who are not familiar with this lovely bit of motherhood, it's equivalent to setting an alarm clock to go off every hour and a half, then putting said alarm clock on a very sensitive part of your body and letting it chow down for about 15 minutes, and continuing to do this around the clock. It's lovely. I begin to lose my mind at about 3 am. Last night, he started crying for about the 5th time since I had gone to bed, and I sat up and held him without feeding him for about 5 minutes of screaming before it dawned on me that he is hungry. Again.

Plus, with the whole bed issue with Alex. The fact that she is not caged in (excuse my terminology, but really, what is a crib if not a cage?) has effectively cut 2 (sometimes more) hours off of her night's sleep. Effectively cutting 2 (sometimes more) hours off of MY night's sleep. 6:30 comes really early! Especially when the way you are welcomed into 'awake-land' is by two little hands slamming on the door across the hall. Repeatedly.



So, all of this leads me to this. I am thinking of turning our house into a bed and breakfast. You know, a place for all those weary travelers to come and get a good rest before they head back out on the road. After, of course, their filling breakfast of peanut butter toast (with the peanut butter mostly licked off) and half mashed, half chewed bananas. Let me know if I can book you a room.