Why is it when you set a goal for yourself, everything around you seems to topple over into your path, making the road that has been nice and straight and clear now congested and dangerous to travel? Why is it when I'm not training for any run in particular, I can run and be fine and up my mileage (when my laziness doesn't get in the way), but as soon as I set a goal, say maybe a half marathon, my hamstring is all, you wanna waaaaaa? and pulls itself all out of whack? Life is crazy.
My sidelined leg has me doing lots of thinking on what I can do to keep my body moving and improving while I can't run. I do work out DVD's (p90x and Jillian Michael's 30 day shred [I really dislike her sometimes]), but those get boring. Walking is good, but that gets boring. I would love to do some kind of sport, like volleyball or racquetball, but finding the time as well as the other players is difficult. I play with the kids, but I would also like something that doesn't have as much potential to swirl down into crisis mode at the drop of a hat.
Do you know what I like? What I was doing for quite a while but had to stop because of our vacation to the States? What I am most certainly going to rejoin as soon as I can?
P...p....p..... pole-dancing.
Ha.
That's right. I said it. Dancing that is done on a pole. A pooooooole. On which you dance.
If you know me in the flesh you are probably scratching your head at this. I mean... remember this? That doesn't sound like someone who is ready to hop on a pole. But it totally is.
I was introduced to it through a friend of a friend, who was having a birthday party at a small studio that is literally in someones backyard. It only has 3 poles, and the party was more of what you expected when you think Pole Dancing. There were flashy lights, and Sexy Faces were strongly encouraged. I was there, in my big t-shirt and long pants (25 pounds heavier than I am now), a little shy of this big metal thing that I was supposed to swing around. Near the end of the party, they mentioned they did 6 week courses, where you begin in level one and move your way up the ladder (or...er... pole) at your own pace. I was intrigued. I did have a lot of fun at the party... but to do this weekly? Eesh.
But with a few friends, I signed up and decided to just do it. This blip of a life is too short to just refuse to try things. So I show up for my first class in my pants and t-shirt, only to find out that I am way overdressed. That won't swing this time. This time I am supposed to be able to actually use the pole and to do that, it needs skin contact. Next time I came prepared in shorts and a tank-top. And I still could hardly do anything. Did you know it's actually quite hard to get your big butt on that thing? The class was not like the party. The lights were turned on, we did a warm-up, we worked our butts off. These girls were serious. And I was intimidated. Because I couldn't do a darn thing.
But that's exactly why I wanted to bring this class up on here. Because, 3-4 months in, the differences were amazing. I have not done any other kind of sport in which you see your improvement so dramatically. My first attempt to climb up the pole was laughable, ending up in a prolonged squeeeeeeeeeee as I sadly slid down onto the floor. But by the end, I was getting all the way up and doing moves that used only your upper body strength to keep you from crashing to the ground. And it was so, much, fun.
The class was small, only 6 girls, and while I was one of the bigger ones, I received nothing but encouragement, and I felt that everyone was just as excited as I was when I finally reached the top (because it did take a while). I have never had this strong of an upper body, even when I was involved in three different sports a year in high school. And because of the logistics of pole-dancing, I was able to see that, while my body was big, it was capable. It was able. I could do this. The moves I had the hardest time with were the ones that I went into them thinking that there is no way I am going to be able to do that with my leg while holding on with just my pinkie! Well, maybe I'm exaggerating, but there were some silly moves! But in order to do any of them, I needed to step out of my head, encourage myself, and just go for it. And you know what? Sometimes all that accomplished was me hitting the floor really hard (I had some magnificent bruises!). But then I just tried again. And again. And again. And each time there would be improvement. Sometimes it took quite a few sessions to get it down, but it happened. And there is nothing better than doing something that, at the beginning, seemed impossible. Whether it be climbing up a pole, or running a 5k, or finishing college, or deciding to just be ok with yourself exactly how you are. There are so many goals that we all set for ourselves, and so many fall by the wayside because we get into our own heads and decide that it cannot be done. So we fail before we even take the first step.
I've found through most things that if you can get past the first step, the next one will be easier, and the one after that will come a little more naturally. It's that first step, the one into unknown territory, the one that send us into a place where we might fail, where we might uncover some weakness... that step is scary. It's so scary. But the fear from going in head first, then the exhilaration that fills you when you survive... that will keep you going. And success may be one day away, it may be one year away, it may be ten years away, or it may be just out of your grasp even up until the end... But really... when you think about it, I wasn't excited that I was sitting at the top of the pole (that actually hurts quite a bit, holding yourself up there!). I was excited because I took that journey. I was excited because the bruises were worth it. I was excited because I was able to set a new goal.
So go ahead, take the first step. Take the leap, take the plunge... whatever you want to call it. You may fall flat on your face. And that's ok. It will be an awesome story to tell. Log it, look at what didn't work, and keep going. Live your life.
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